We return to Downton, now a convalescent home in full swing, full of hopes and dreams of what we might find inside. I must say, this week's episode surpassed some of these dreams and shoved others into the dirt. Ugh. Here we go...
- It opens with Mary saying she's finished with Matthew for good (brass knuckles +1). That is so not okay! Time out, Mary! Think before you speak! You're giving me heart problems!
- Mrs. Crawley's been letting the power of bossing people around at the house go straight to her head a lot recently. But it finally gets to the point where I want to push her backwards or break out my-- (brass knuckles +2). She threatens to hand in her notice several times and Lady G tells her to have at it. Atta girl! Mrs. Crawley decides to go to France to help out in a hospital. Gosh she drives me nuts! Bon voyage!
- Then Branson tells Sybil, "The truth is, I'll stay in Downton until you want to run away with me" (smelling salts +1
bajillion). OH MY GOSH, THIS MAN!!!!!!!!!
- Sybil thinks this declaration is a bit extreme, but he carries on saying, "You're too scared to admit it, but you're in love with me" (smelling salts +2
zillion). ARE YOU KIDDING ME, BRANSON?!?! Ughhhh!!!!!!! Smear this man on toast. Sybil! You know you want him!
|I just want to reach in and scribble all over this.|
- Mary writes to Matthew telling him about her pending engagement with Sir Richard (brass knuckles +3). NOW WE HAVE A SERIOUS PROBLEM MARY!
- Sybil's out in the gardens... and there's a voiceover of what Branson told her earlier (smelling salts +3). So she's obviously thinking about it and it's
about timeamaaazing! Plus this is the only voiceover I'm aware of ever happening on this show. Branson apparently just does things to everybody!
- At the Crawley's house, Mrs. Bird has set up a soup kitchen for wounded soldiers (smelling salts +4). Ugh... my heart is getting a little melty.
- *GASP* COUSIN MATTHEW AND WILLIAM HAVE GONE MISSING (brass knuckles +4)! Wha- wha- wha- what the- NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- Ethel is caught in bed with the major she's been flirting with and is immediately dismissed (brass knuckles +5). Who's going to let O'Bitch O'Brien have it now? Thanks a lot, Ethel!
- Lord G shows up at the pub to see Mr. B and while at first I'm a bit "oh sweet reunion!" the truth is that I've had it with Mr. B trying to be all noble, concealing the real reason for why he left Downton (brass knuckles +6). I should be psyched that Lord G has convinced him to come back to them, but I'm not. I'm sorry, Mr. B, but this is TOTALLY going to backfire. If you think you can prevent your cray-cray thievin' wife from going to the press with Mary's secret, you have another thing coming! And you're going to be a life ruiner because of it, especially regarding Anna and Mary. Please tell me someone else feels the same way! Damn it, Bates!
- In the midst of this whole conversation, Lord G confides that he loves Cousin Matthew like a son (smelling salts +5). My heart striiiiings!!! Come back to us, Cousin Matthew! Please don't be dead!
- O'Brien spies Daisy and Mrs. Patmore bringing food from Downton to the Crawley's house. She's obviously trying to get them in trouble even though she doesn't know why they're doing what they're doing (brass knuckles +7). O'Brien, I don't know how many times we have to go through this... some things aren't your business. And I don't like you at all.
- Sybil tells Mary about Branson, but says she's not sure if she likes him like that (brass knuckles +8). Allow me to clarify for you, Sybil... YES YOU DO!
- Thomas and O'Bitch are showering their jerkdom down on Daisy and Mr. B respectively (brass knuckles +9). Karma? Are you there, karma? What the heck?! Intervene!
|Loved this shot.|
- Sybil tells Branson that she told Mary everything. He smiles saying that it's the "first time you've ever spoken about us" (smelling slats +6). ACK!
- Edith, in a rare bout of compassion, tells Mary that Cousin Matthew is missing and Mary gets a mad case of creyes for eyes. BECAUSE SHE OBVIOUSLY STILL LOVES HIM (smelling salts +7)! This comes as no surprise, but I just like it when the writers reassuringly squeeze my hand like this.
- In the middle of the next soup kitchen chez Crawley, Lady G shows up unannounced with O'Brien. When she discovers what they've been doing, she's a total angel. She tells O'B to get cracking helping out and tells Mrs. Patmore to start taking food from Downton itself and not the Army in order to feed these men (smelling salts +8).
- At a concert being held for the soldiers, Edith and Mary sing a song together. Our most quotable Countess says, "Well now I've seen everything!" (smelling salts +9). Bahaha!
- AND THEN- HOLY FRICK FRACKIN' HALLELUJAH- COUSIN MATTHEW WALKS IN (smelling salts +10)!!!!!!!!!!!!!
|The perfect picture of ALL CAPS FEELINGS!!!|
- Mary immediately stops singing, but then he jumps in to sing with her (smelling salts +11). BECAUSE IT'S TRUE LOVE!!! And it's just the absolute sweetest moment and I want to curl up in a ball in the floor and open the floodgates to my CREYES! Dear readers, I'm so obsessed with this scene, I just can't help adding it here for your viewing pleasure:
- Afterward, he tells her he got her letter and that Sir Richard better be good to her or he'll have to answer to him. Guh! He talks about the war and she squeezes his hand and OMG THEY ARE TOUCHING AND I'M FEELING ALL THE FEELINGS (smelling salts +12)!
- Thomas tells O'Brien that he could care less about Mr. B these days, but she notes that she doesn't give up on her grudges so easily (brass knuckles +10). Give it a rest, O'Bitch!
- The episode finishes with Ethel returning to Downton Abbey and she's- you guessed it- pregnant (brass knuckles +11). I'm not surprised, and I don't loathe her exactly, but I thought we'd gotten rid of one of the potential evil ones. Womp womp.
P.S. I think we can all relate to this...
Bahaha! So funny!!! "His eyes are piercing!" and "EDITH!" are my favorites. Maybe because those are two of my most common outbursts. What are your reactions whilst watching Downton Abbey?